Thursday, November 29, 2012

Barf




"We all have a reservoir of love that is probably endless. We're all just too scared to probe the depths and 
find out how very far the bottom is".
So I'm pregnant again and miserable. I'm pretty sure I win the award for despising pregnancy more than any other woman that ever walked the earth. Literally. I know all the usual solutions, be more grateful, look on the bright side, it's only 7 more months out of my whole life, I will be so glad when it's over...blah, blah, blah. I HATE every minute of this. My mom pointed out to me that I'm the happiest momma once I have my new baby. For me that part is easy, but the cooking it part is where I struggle. Is there such a thing as pre-partum? If there is, I think I may have that.

I'm constantly starving but all food makes me want to heave. Tim asks me if I've eaten (because it does help the nausea some) and the question makes me cry because it's so traumatizing to have to eat food. I got some intense nausea medication but it doesn't help. I'm not sure if Tim will survive this either because I'm a freak. I walk around the house with my nose in my shirt, in fear of smelling anything. I drop dead and nap for 3 hours at a time. I don't get out of my jammies. When he comes home for lunch, I ask him to take his food back to work to eat so I don't have to see/smell it. The worst part is how I cry about everything. I'll be reading a perfectly normal-not-that-sad-book to them....bawling, I will peek in on them asleep in their beds....cry. It's so annoying.

The due date for Biscuit #6 is July 12, 2013. Yes, I know, that sounds  like 300 years away. It's a good thing Ezra is so delicious. He's my reminder that this is worth it.


6 comments:

M. said...

congrats!

Elizabeth said...

It's a bigger blessing to be happy after...but I do sympathize! I'd barf for you everyday if I could:))

Liesel said...

Thanks for the honesty. I'm picturing you with your nose in your shirt.

Kamry Low said...

I'm so glad you posted this. not that you feel so crappy but I was pretty sure I was the person that HATED pregnancy the most in the whole world. I'm glad i'm not the only one. I agree there has to be pre-partum blues or whatever. I'm horrible and i feel horrible when i'm pregnant. I have no problems with the little baby and just love it. It makes it hard to imagine having more pregnancies but sad to think i wouldn't have more babies. Hope it gets better for you and you make really cute babies!

Unknown said...

Sarra I am so excited for you! you can do this! how are the kids handling it? My prayers are with you!

Unknown said...

I am so late for reading this but congratulations!!! Yay, another beautiful baby in the world. You made me happy to read this today, :) I love your family!