"Keeping my pace and focus as steady and calm as I can in the moments and days to come, despite the feeling that the whole world is rushing around and by me this season. There's no reason to race. In fact, there's every reason not to."
It reminded me of this talk from General Conference by Elder Uchtdorf titled
So this year my family was going to do service projects for each other instead of presents but I should have known how that would go down. No one in my family can resist buying presents. Which I have to admit ends up being pretty fun anyways, except that I stick to the rules and feel like a meanie. I say all this only to explain why our gift for my parents was a Christmas Program. We actually planned it for months and it was neat that they had a few songs they had written themselves planned. It was no small feat getting a cello, ukulele, music, the written program, and 4 fresh memories, to Edmonton among millions of other things. Plus, in my nauseous state, the simplest tasks are too difficult to bare- take having a shower for example, it's so exhausting that it requires a long nap afterwards to recover. Baba had to watch from work on Skype but Grammy, Mark and Jared were there. We were missing Eli's fam and Mariah.
Grammy bawled throughout. She was lamenting the thought of them getting older which I of course get waves of sadness for daily. Mark said he saw me about to cry during one part and that may be true but he could have easily too if he had been alone.
There were so many cute moments. This is Jane helping Scarlet bow after her memorization:
Counsel with the Lord in all thy doings, and he will direct thee for good; yea, when thou liest down at night lie down unto the Lord, that he may watch over you in your sleep; and when thou risest in the morning let thy heart be full of thanks unto God; and if ye do these things, ye shall be lifted up at the last day (Alma 37:37).
Jacob's memorization blew my mind. He recited a poem that we barely had learned once. He said it totally alone, from beginning to end, flawlessly. I could not. believe. it.
Jared brought me down to his room so I could wrap gifts for him. The next thing I knew, he was pulling gifts out of every nook and cranny- under the bed, in the closet, from drawers... He loves to get the nieces and nephews toys.
I had to post this picture because Scarlet LOVES her bear from Uncle J. It made for a great car pillow on the way home too.
Ezra's first Christmas.
Food in Jars. Can't wait to study this book, as soon as I like food again.
We went to Fairmont Hot Springs for a week at Christmas to snowboard so we got the three older kids snowboards this year.
I was worried Scarlet would feel left out of the snowboarding but she was happy as a clam with her yellow lace parasol and teal tutu.
Shepherds would soon arrive and, later, wise men
would follow from the East. But first and forever there was just a little
family, without toys or trees or tinsel. With a baby—that’s how Christmas began.
"We all have a reservoir of love that is probably
endless. We're all just too scared to probe the depths and find out how very
far the bottom is".
So I'm pregnant again and miserable. I'm pretty sure I win the award for despising pregnancy more than any other woman that ever walked the earth. Literally. I know all the usual solutions, be more grateful, look on the bright side, it's only 7 more months out of my whole life, I will be so glad when it's over...blah, blah, blah. I HATE every minute of this. My mom pointed out to me that I'm the happiest momma once I have my new baby. For me that part is easy, but the cooking it part is where I struggle. Is there such a thing as pre-partum? If there is, I think I may have that.
I'm constantly starving but all food makes me want to heave. Tim asks me if I've eaten (because it does help the nausea some) and the question makes me cry because it's so traumatizing to have to eat food. I got some intense nausea medication but it doesn't help. I'm not sure if Tim will survive this either because I'm a freak. I walk around the house with my nose in my shirt, in fear of smelling anything. I drop dead and nap for 3 hours at a time. I don't get out of my jammies. When he comes home for lunch, I ask him to take his food back to work to eat so I don't have to see/smell it. The worst part is how I cry about everything. I'll be reading a perfectly normal-not-that-sad-book to them....bawling, I will peek in on them asleep in their beds....cry. It's so annoying.
The due date for Biscuit #6 is July 12, 2013. Yes, I know, that sounds like 300 years away. It's a good thing Ezra is so delicious. He's my reminder that this is worth it.
Charlie took a few days to decide what to do for his writing project. One idea he had was to tell a story from the point of view of a boy living in Jerusalem when Jesus was on the earth. I thought that was a wonderful idea but it turned out to be a little too difficult, so it was back to the drawing board. Then I realized that he can expound for hours when he starts telling us about each of his animals from his collection. We decided to take a picture of each animal and then attach it to one page and he wrote about it on the opposing page. It ended up being 57 pages! Quite a lot of writing for a 7 year old.
These pictures below are of Charlie arranging his animals for pictures. I like how meticulous he was about getting the picture just how he wanted it. The pictures actually took him hours. Charlie was very diligent about getting each animal and sticking to the task. The book turned out great and I think it will be awesome to have when he's older.
Charlie also finished this sewing project. Jane had made a mouse so he decided on the puppy.
Jane had started some poetry in her nature notebook so we continued on with poems for her writing project. She did some water color drawings to go with her poems.
This was for our Person of Eminence day at the Alternate School. This assignment was actually a lot of work, but we learned so much. I like these kinds of projects because as my friend Eve put it on her blog, "it's about decorating the insides'-- Filling the walls of our minds with beautiful ideas and the most important truths that we can find... Over time, I'm amazed at how much they each have to draw from in their beautiful minds."
Jane presented Handel, Jacob was Gandhi, Charlie was Alexander the Great, and Scarlet was the Empress Theodora.
After the first performance of Messiah, Handel said:
“My Lord, I should be sorry if I only
entertained them; I wish to make them better.”
Charlie told about how Alexander the Great conquered entire kingdoms, but he never did conquer himself. He shared this scripture,
"For what shall it profit a man, if he shallagainthe whole world,